It could be the little guy lying on my lap, suckling. I'm pretty sure he's a big part of it. It could also be all that time I spent letting my husband know he meant the world to me, all those wonderful years when I knew it would all end one day, and I'd better make the most of it.
It could be that movie I used to watch, over and over, when I was a teenager, the one where those guys made soap out of lyposuction fat and that man blew up the apartment that contained all the stuff he had collected over the years.
The house in which we were going to be a family now lies vacant, looted, I'm sure, somewhere north of here. From that place I have only my beautiful son, his car seat, and as many of his clothes as I could fit into a diaper bag. I live in my Mom's spare room, suckling my child as I type this, waiting for those welfare people to call me back, so I can take him in to get the last of his booster shots, and so I can maybe get some help buying groceries.
I make ten dollars a night babysitting another woman's kids, less than minimum wage. Am I poor? Am I alone? Have I hit the bottom? I've never been better! I'm safe, I have my son, I'm fed and clothed, and, best of all I'm happy! Yes, yes, there are still worries in life, still stuff I have to deal with, still grime to clean up.
But I feel free. I feel good, I feel closer to my husband who I write daily than I've ever been before, and I'm doing two of my favorite things in the whole world: suckling my son, and talking about him. As long as he sleeps in my lap, I'm the richest woman in the world. I can wear hand-me-down clothes and never really own a thing in my life until my funeral, for all I care. If I died right now, what would I wish I had done? Exactly what I'm doing now. Log in or register to write something here or to contact authors.
I still can't think of anything, or how Fight Club changed my life cooled by Demeter. The steering wheel begins to slip. No hands. Motion in darkness. Headlights and horns. Nothing, come on, get in the right lane. If you were to die right now, how would you feel about your life? Is that what you wanted to hear me say? I watched it sometime about six months before I changed every single thing in my life that I could to get myself out of this hole of worthlessness and stagnation that had been turning me colder and colder for months.
I swallowed and I curl ed, unable to believe I could feel so small. I felt absolutely nothing good about my life, and I was scared scared scared scared scared to the point of convulsion and cowardice and pain of dying. Scared of dying. I was crying in a darkened movie theatre. How could you do this? I was terrified of dying so I clung to the pathetic shell that was that life because I felt I had done nothing.
Absolutely nothing. I felt I had nothing to show for myself. My life was a waste of this pathetic world and I was a horrible slobbering creature too afraid of the light to stick my head out of my cave, lost in its tears and in sweat of nothingness. And I wanted to die. Dying would get me out. Dying would be easy. But there would be nothing to show. No reason to say I lived. I was a the strangest point in my life, and it was a crossroads.
I was in a relationship that was going nowhere. No, it was going somewhere , and it was down and down and down all the way. It was like my father. My lover was pulling me and I was letting myself fall into this pit of self-loathing and isolation , afraid of the world outside.
I felt nothing good about my life. And this was the first time anyone had put it into words. I left the continent and felt Caribbean warmth and began to wake up.
I lost my lover by telling him to go away. I fell in love for the first time in ages and cried and cried and cried when I looked back at the year behind me and felt the stillness of all of it. I always thought I was so strong. I had died. I saw Fight Club for a third time and laughed and laughed and laughed at the sickness and the irreverence for all that our society holds sacred. I laughed. And I started to think of things I became an artist. I started writing again. I made friends and had lovers and felt so much I could cry all the way home , and I saw death when a father of a friend commit suicide.
So much horrible ness has happened. I have never felt more alive. Perspective is everything. I saw Fight Club last night. But I can feel. I am whole. No regrets. Oh sure, there's stuff I want to do before I die. But nothing I could look back on and say 'I wish I had done that while I had the chance'. Hollow Hearts 3. I'm Not Afraid to Die 4. London, Pt. Oxygen Don't Hold Your Breath 7. Paige and 14Th 8. Safe to Say 9. The Difference Between Us Cheeeek that out dude.
Lead RIFFs:. Bad selection. While buried in the Zoroastrian tradition, Freddie, himself, seldom practiced the family religion. He designed Queen 's famous crest using his and his fellow band mates' birth signs: Two lions for Roger and John Leo , a crab for Brian Cancer , and two fairies for himself Virgo.
He achieved grade IV in practical piano and theory. Despite being a classically trained pianist, he admitted in an interview Melody Maker, 2 May that he could read "very little" sheet music. His classical training influenced some of his compositions for Queen , especially in the early years of the band.
He was of Persian descent. His ancestors were Persians who fled to India. Aretha Franklin was one of his favorite singers. His baby photo won photograph of the year in in his hometown. It is generally accepted that he was diagnosed as HIV positive in the spring of One of the main criticisms leveled at the biopic Bohemian Rhapsody was that it changed this to immediately before Live Aid for dramatic effect.
Queen won the Brit Award for Outstanding Contribution in All four members of the band came to the stage to accept the award. It was Mercury's last appearance in front of an audience. On 11 November , he was inducted as part of Queen into the UK Music Hall of Fame for their outstanding contribution to British music and integral part of British music culture.
He was a huge fan of actress and Broadway star Liza Minnelli. He was survived by Jim Hutton , his partner since He released his first solo album, "Mr.
Bad Guy", in early Although it is often remembered now as a flop and described as such by Queen 's manager , it actually performed reasonably well in the UK, where it peaked at number six and stayed on the chart for 23 weeks, making it ultimately the most successful Queen solo project.
He used a piano as a headboard for his bed and taught himself to play the piano backwards so if a song idea popped into his head when lying in bed, he could reach backwards and play it or record it. He was voted the No. The historic gig fought off competition from Jimi Hendrix 's Woodstock show in second place and Sex Pistols ' raucous show at the Manchester Free Trade Hall in Following the announcement of his death, tributes came from some of the biggest names in the British music industry.
David Bowie said: "We'll all miss him a lot. Together with his band Queen he made a great contribution to popular music. I religiously attended Queen's concerts year after year. This is a sad day. I had the greatest admiration and a lot of affection for him. He was a very dear friend of mine and it was a privilege to have known him for some of his life. He was very funny, he was extremely outrageous, he was very kind and he was a great musician and one of the great frontmen of rock and roll bands.
Mercury died from AIDS. Eric died from cancer, which led to a brain hemorrhage. In , over 2, music fans were asked by O2 to vote for their dream supergroup. He once gave the actor Dustin Hoffman a guided tour of his mansion as Hoffman was thinking of hiring the same designer, Robin Moore-Ede, to renovate an old house he had bought in London.
Mercury is the second most impersonated rock and roll performer in the UK after Elvis Presley. He was the cousin of Perviz Darukhanawalla. He was the son of Bomi and Jer Bulsara. He was the older brother of Kashmira Cooke. In , while Queen were recording their first album, Freddie Mercury released a single under the name Larry Lurex.
The name is a pun of glam rock star Gary Glitter's name and the metallic yarn Lurex. Barely being able to stand because of his illness, Brian May told Mercury that he would sing the vocals for him. Mercury refused, mustered all of his strength, and sang his first take perfectly. He didn't socialize with the other members of Queen because he had different interests, such as spending time on the gay scene and visiting ballet and opera productions.
He had a huge crush on the film star Burt Reynolds and liked men who had a similar rugged look. He disliked giving interviews and rarely spoke to the press. He only trusted a select group of journalists. They played at local schools, parties and restaurants. Zahid appeared in the Feddie Mercury documentary released in He was born on the same day as Dennis Dugan. His friend, the DJ Paul Gambaccini , has said in several interviews that he knew Mercury was going to die of AIDS as early as because he had met him in a gay bar and asked him if he was taking precautions against this "new disease", to which Mercury had responded "fuck it, I'm doing everything with everybody".
Because the United Kingdom forbids the Zoroastrian practice of deposing remains by having birds eat them, Freddie Mercury had his remains cremated and put in the custody of Mary Austin to keep in a location of whose knowledge she is the sole possessor.
Every year between Christmas Day and New Year's, starting 10am at Christmas Day and ending at on New Year's Eve, a Dutch radio station called Radio 2 has an annual Top Songs, playing all of these songs one after another without breaks. Everyone listening can vote a week in advance for their favorite songs and the eventual list is based on these votes.
From the 19 editions of the Top , Bohemian Rhapsody from Mercury's Queen came in 1st 15 times making it the ultimate winner. He often smoked 40 cigarettes a day, which led to a roughening of his singing voice in the s. Like many other singers, his voice was enhanced for studio recording by using layered vocals. When he played the piano during concerts there was a professional playing a piano offstage with the "hot mike", while Mercury's microphone was turned down.
If I didn't do this well, I just wouldn't have anything to do I can't cook, and I'd be a terrible housewife. Years ago, I thought up the name Queen It's just a name, but it's very regal obviously, and it sounds splendid It's a strong name, very universal and immediate. It had a lot of visual potential and was open to all sorts of interpretations. I was certainly aware of the gay connotations, but that was just one facet of it. The only friend I've got is Mary and I don't want anybody else.
To me, she was my common-law wife. To me, it was a marriage. We believe in each other, thats enough for me. I couldn't fall in love with a man the same way as I have with Mary.
We'll write it across the sky Won't look back and say goodbye This is a battlecry-y-y I'm not afraid to die I'm not afraid to die We'll write it across the sky Won't look back and say goodbye This is a battlecry-y-y I'm not afraid to die I'm not afraid to die I'm not afraid to die I'm not afraid to die This is a battlecry-y-y I'm not afraid to die.
Cannot annotate a non-flat selection. Make sure your selection starts and ends within the same node. All News Daily Roundup. Album Reviews Song Reviews. Song Lyrics.
Scene III - Stravinsky* - Pulcinella • The Fairys Kiss (CD, Album), Mogly - Guy Gerber - This Is Balagan (Vinyl), Ding-Dong Boogie - Ella Fitzgerald with Sy Oliver And His Orchestra - Volume 6, Ella & Sy 1949-1954, Sick For The Cure - Cinderella (3) - Heartbreak Station (CD, Album), Making Videos - Queen - Days Of Our Lives - The Definitive Documentary Of The Worlds Greatest Rock B, Arms Of Mary - Various - Disco-Fox Vol. 2 (CD), Boys - Various - Variétés Volume 2 (CD), Eldegardsfossen - Various - Norsk Folkemusikk 1-10 (Box Set, Album), What Hurts The Most (Spencer & Hill Dub Mix), 3. Danza Del Fuego Your Neanderthal-Father Fucked Your Retarded Mother - Apator - Your Mother Should Have Had An Aborti